Over the past decade, Dave Wallace has suffered three strokes, a heart attack, a heartbreaking loss, and stomach cancer, and yet somehow, he and his wife Rena, both in their early 70s, keep raising their sprits with trips abroad and active adventures.<\/p>\n
\u201cAfter my strokes, I learned that 75 per cent of stroke patients become depressed, and I decided that the best way to combat that was to pretend to be positive. So, I pretended to be positive and low and behold, after six weeks I was positive,\u201d said Dave.<\/p>\n
While relearning how to walk and talk occupied the better part of seven months of rehab, Dave poured equal efforts into remembering how to read. \u201cIn rehab, I talked to my brain, apologized for having damaged it, and asked it to hook up a network so I could read again. After about six weeks, my brain was pleased to grow new pathways and I was able to read again,\u201d he said proudly.<\/p>\n
The couple delight in sharing that they met at ages 15 and 16, both working at a library in Winnipeg. Four years later they were married, and this year they celebrated their 53-year anniversary.<\/p>\n
\u201cI have to say it\u2019s not always been easy, but my life is very good. I guess being positive, and taking one day at a time \u2013 this is what we do, and it works for us,\u201d said Rena.<\/p>\n
Unfathomable loss<\/strong><\/p>\n In 2016, after Dave\u2019s strokes and before his cancer, Dave and Rena lost their only child, their son Adam, in a car accident.<\/p>\n \u201cAt that time, we were in our 60s and about to retire. We had made plans to go to Europe and walk the Camino. The lease was up on our condo, so we packed up and went to Spain for three months. For 41 days we walked the Camino; from Saint-Jean-Pied-de-Port, France to Santiago de Compostela, Spain. We stopped in every church along the way and lit candles for our son Adam and we finished on July 9, Adam\u2019s birthday,\u201d said Dave.<\/p>\n When they got back, Dave and Rena took their restless spirits on the road. \u201cWe moved to Kelowna for a year and then to Halifax for three years, and then we just kept on moving. We moved and moved and moved, all part of our grieving process,\u201d said Dave.<\/p>\n The cancer gene<\/strong><\/p>\n Dave\u2019s cancer story is a bit unconventional\u2026 beginning with genetic testing, when, in his 60s, he learned from several cousins that some in their family shared a familial trait \u2013 a gene called CDH1 that predisposed its carriers to stomach cancer.<\/p>\n \u201cMy mom died of stomach cancer and five or six of my aunts had stomach cancer as well, so this is what sparked the genetic probing to see what the common factor was,\u201d said Dave. \u201cIn 2019, I had a blood test, but the genetics lab in Halifax didn\u2019t know much about this gene, so my bloodwork went to the UCLA genetics lab in the States, and it came back as positive. I\u2019m one of the unlucky ones to have this gene, so I\u2019m a carrier,\u201d said Dave.<\/p>\n With no signs of cancer at that time, the pair carried on with their life, staying attuned to health, and researching stomach cancer treatments.<\/p>\n Then while living back in Calgary, in July 2021, scans revealed two cancerous spots on Dave\u2019s stomach, and six weeks later, at age 69, he underwent a radical surgery to have his stomach removed.<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019ve heard of whirlwind romances\u2026 well this was whirlwind medical intervention,\u201d said Rena.<\/p>\n For those wondering what a \u2018new normal\u2019 looks like for someone without a stomach, Dave has the inside story.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ve certainly had all sorts of issues; passing out in the shower, passing out when I got up to go to the bathroom at night, losing 70 pounds, etcetera. But right now it\u2019s pretty under control \u2013 I\u2019m learning to live with it,\u201d said Dave, adding, \u201cI can only can eat small amounts at a time and I have to get up every night and eat at 2:00 or 3:00 am.\u201d<\/p>\n Always looking for the silver lining, the pair say that cancer led them to Wellspring \u2013 an immensely appreciated community of support when they were most in need.<\/p>\n Wellspring on the way<\/strong><\/p>\n \u201cI walk a lot, and when we landed back in Calgary during the pandemic in September 2020, I often walked past Carma House and wondered what is this place?<\/em> One day in January 2021, as I walked past the building, someone was walking in the door, so I walked in behind them. When I learned that Wellspring supports cancer patients, caregivers and families, I said, \u201cOh my God, we need you \u2013 we really need you!\u201d\u201d said Rena.<\/p>\n The pair signed up for many programs, including yoga, Exercise and Educate and Supportive Conversations. Rena joined Pole Walking, Tai Chi and Knitting. Dave found great comfort in Men\u2019s Group, and they both found their groove in the summer cycling program.<\/p>\n \u201cWellspring has been such a great resource for us \u2013 a tremendous source of friendship and connection,\u201d said Rena, adding, \u201cI get so much from time spent with the knitting group, and Men\u2019s Group really opened Dave\u2019s eyes and his ability to share his thoughts and emotions. It\u2019s great.\u201d<\/p>\n Dave agrees, noting that he was in a slump due to the pandemic, but Wellspring brought him back around.<\/p>\n \u201cMy own family is splintered, but it\u2019s one of those things where you\u2019re in a group with others who have cancer, and they become your family. They know what you\u2019re going through. You can talk to them about everything and you feel like they care,\u201d he said. \u201cAlong with programs, we have gone to concerts at Wellspring, taken part in BBQs, met other members there for coffee, it\u2019s just a great place to go and be apart of.\u201d<\/p>\n Rena on caregiving<\/strong><\/p>\n \u201cThe part of caregiving that I find difficult is that Dave wants to be very independent, and we are sometimes at loggerheads because I think I could help him more than he allows me to,\u201d said Rena, adding that with his short-term memory loss, he sometimes forgets to tell her he has fallen or passed out; she discovers this herself when a bruise shows the evidence.<\/p>\n But overall, she explains that the couple has a workable routine where Dave stays on top of how much, when and what he can eat, and together they share the cooking and cleaning. She also says that they now have separate bedrooms, which helps prevent sleep deprivation for her when Dave gets up for nighttime meals.<\/p>\n Moving right along<\/strong><\/p>\n One thing is certain, near catastrophic health issues may have sidelined this couple, but it did not derail their sense of adventure.<\/p>\n \u201cSince our three-month trip to Spain, we\u2019ve spent six weeks in Greece, six weeks in France, six weeks in Portugal, and last spring we spent a month in Italy,\u201d said Dave.<\/p>\n Next up, the pair are joining a couple they met at Wellspring and planning a 315-kilometre -cycling trip along the Portuguese Coastal route of the Camino.<\/p>\n \u201cCancer is everywhere in both our families, but we can\u2019t let that rob us of the good life we can make for ourselves,\u201d said Dave. \u201cOne day at a time, we make our way,\u201d adds Rena.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Over the past decade, Dave Wallace has suffered three strokes, a heart attack, a heartbreaking loss, and stomach cancer, and yet somehow, he and his wife Rena, both in their early 70s, keep raising their sprits with trips abroad and active adventures. \u201cAfter my strokes, I learned that 75 per cent of stroke patients become […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":26,"featured_media":12777,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"location":[],"class_list":["post-12776","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-member-story"],"yoast_head":"\n