Community Healing: Pam’s Journey
Pam had plenty on her mind last February, the grief of losing her dad just a few months earlier was still fresh, and she was recovering from oral surgery. Between juggling her work and everyday life, she barely registered the occasional pain in her breast, brushing it off as nothing serious.
Then, out of the blue, her sister sent her a silly Instagram video: a song and dance encouraging women to do a breast self-exam. “We thought it was funny, I watched it a couple of times, and then the song was stuck in my head,” Pam recalled. “Later in the day, the thought came to me, you should check your breast.”
That’s when she felt it: a lump the size of a grape. Still, she remained optimistic. With no history of any kind of cancer in her family, breast cancer was not on her radar.
But a mammogram and ultrasound confirmed the unthinkable. “Hearing that it was cancer was one of the scariest moments of my life,” she recalled.
Pam had gone to the appointment alone, telling her husband Mike not to bother coming. “I was so relaxed, not stressed, totally confident it was nothing. I was really in denial,” she admits. But after hearing the news, she immediately called Mike, and he rushed to be by her side.
The Edmonton clinic where she was treated was, in her words, “exceptional – the staff were amazing — I was treated so well.” A biopsy the next day confirmed aggressive, fast-growing cancer. Just three weeks later, she had surgery, a lumpectomy and lymph node biopsy. The results revealed metaplastic triple-negative breast cancer, a rare and frightening diagnosis. “I Googled it and the outcome looked horrible; it was terrifying,” she said.
Though her lymph nodes were clear, doctors recommended chemotherapy since this type of cancer can spread through the bloodstream. Pam began chemo on May 17, 2024, the day after her 50th birthday.
Amid the fear, one bit of good news shone through: genetic testing came back negative for BRCA genes, a huge relief for Pam and her family. Surrounded by her husband, two adult children, five siblings, and many close friends, Pam leaned on her support system as she braced for what came next.
The Trials of Treatment
Pam began six rounds of chemotherapy, spaced three weeks apart, and it was one of the most difficult experiences she had ever faced. The treatments left her weak, in pain, and unbelievably fatigued.
“There were days I couldn’t stay awake for more than 20 minutes at a time. I couldn’t control my thoughts and feelings, I had a lot of worry, fear, and sadness. I was so dysregulated. I couldn’t handle loud noises or stress. It was really very lonely. I was not myself; I lost myself. I think I had to disassociate from myself because I couldn’t handle or control what was happening. Even my spiritual faith suffered; I couldn’t connect to things, I couldn’t reason through things the way I normally could,” she said.
Through it all, Pam’s family became her anchor. Her husband Mike did his best to care for her, though he later shared how difficult this was for him: Read Mike’s Caregiving Story.
Her daughter Anna, married and a school teacher, was deeply committed to being there for her mom, and during her summer break she became Pam’s “chemo babysitter,” often trading off with Mike. “Anna is very calm and has a comforting presence. She knows me well, and she always seemed to know exactly what I needed,” Pam says. Her son pitched in with groceries and cleaning, and friends and neighbours walked with her and dropped off meals.
Pam was mindful of how hard caregiving was on Mike, making sure he had breaks and time outdoors to recharge. “Mike and I are used to having each other; we’re independent, but we rely on each other,” she shared. “I wanted to make sure he wasn’t just a caregiver all the time.”
This strong circle of support, family, friends, and church community, carried Pam through one of the most challenging periods of her life. And in her own words, Pam shares how Wellspring played a pivotal role in helping her finding her way back to wellness.
Opening to Wellspring [Pam’s account]
“A week and a half after my first chemo treatment, I went for a walk with a neighbour who is also a nurse and used to work at the Cross Cancer Institute. She told me about Wellspring Alberta. She said, “It’s such an amazing place. You should go.”
At first, I thought I was too sick to do anything, but after my second round of chemo, Mike encouraged me, too. I checked the website and was so drawn in by all the programs they offered. I thought, I really have to do this.
It was scary to think about going by myself, but because it was July and my daughter Anna was off school, we registered for an acrylic painting class together. I was hooked immediately. I felt so comfortable and accepted, even bald and in the middle of treatment. There was no worry about how I looked or acted. People just understood.
I am not a painter, but I had so much fun. Anna and I laughed; we just enjoyed ourselves so much. Even on the hardest chemo days, having a place to go that welcomed me exactly as I was made such a difference. By September, I was at Wellspring three times a week doing Zentangle, ACE, Reiki, pottery, painting, guided visualization and relaxation. Sometimes the quiet moments sparked anxiety, but there was so much understanding and support that I could simply let it happen. Those programs helped me start working through my feelings, not just managing them.
Just before I returned to work, I took Pole Walking, which helped me rebuild my stamina and get outside again. Through it all, I found the other participants so easy to talk to. I made real friends at Wellspring. When I started radiation, another member who had just finished gave me tips, and when I was done, I passed those tips on to someone else. That “pay it forward” spirit is a big part of Wellspring, and I very much wanted to be a part of it.
Even now, if I drop by Wellspring when I don’t have a program scheduled, I feel at home. I can sit in the kitchen, read a book, draw, and just be. It’s such a comfortable, safe space.
Physically, I healed well, but the mental and emotional recovery was the hardest part. It took a lot of professional help, community support, and inner work to get to a place where I could regulate my emotions and not feel afraid all the time. Wellspring was a huge part of that process.
Today, I’m back at work as a nurse at the Misericordia Hospital in Edmonton, and I love my job. I often work with patients who have cancer, and I always tell them about Wellspring. It’s a wonderful community where people can find connection, resources, and comfort — and it’s completely free, thanks to donors. Because of that, I can confidently recommend it at work, knowing it’s accessible to anyone who needs it.
Now when I visit Wellspring – yes it reminds me of having cancer, but more importantly it reminds me of working through cancer, learning from people, supporting others, and finding a comfortable place to have cancer.
I don’t just remember the hard days; I remember how far I’ve come. Wellspring gave me hope, healing, and a way forward. And now, I get to share that hope with others.”